SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.
SUN MICROSYSTEMS
You have two cows.
You hire 1100 farmers to make sure the cows produce the best possible milk.
You give the milk away for free.
DELL
You have two cows.
Actually, you don’t have any cows, but you do own the milk processing and logistics system.
Screw the cows.
EMC
You have two cows.
Both produce consistent output of milk.
You fire one of the cows as an example to make the other cow work harder.
The surviving cow produces volume but not superior milk.
You charge a premium and sell twice as much.
NETAPP
You have two cows.
Your cows’ milk is produced in a completely predictable manner for many years.
You win cheese awards in France.
You are chosen as the royal “cream” in Saudi Arabia.
Your cows’ invent a self-pasteurizing process and vote you as the “best farm to live on in the world.”
Wall St. calls you a one trick pony and hammers your stock.
CISCO
You have two cows.
Your milk is good, but very expensive.
You team up with EMC and double the price.
You sell more than everyone else.
MICROSOFT
You have two cows.
The cows only milk properly for a short time, then require a nap.
You get paid everytime someone buys a virtual cow from VMware.
APPLE
You have two cows.
They also are much better than Microsoft’s cows, and no one cares except the loyal farmers who deal with the cows all day.
You build a new interface to milk the cows instead of grabbing onto udders.
You learn to make the cows sing and make cowphones.
The farmers become a cult.
SOFTTEK
You have 50 cows.
The milk is good.
You sell cheap milk but forget to feed the cows.
Cows leave the farm, die or start producing bad milk.
Customers stop buying your milk.
A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.
REDHAT
You have two cows.
They are much better than Microsoft's cows.
No one cares.
1. e2 e4 b8 c6
2. c2 c3 e7 e5
3. d1 f3 g8 e7
4. f1 c4 d7 d6
5. d2 d4 e5 d4
6. c3 d4 c6 d4
7. f3 f4 c8 d7
8. f4 f7
